# I’m afraid I just blue myself

Mike Tribianni . Feb 20, 2017

Michael! As you may or may not know, Lindsay and I have hit a bit of a rough patch. Get me a vodka rocks. And a piece of toast. There's so many poorly chosen words in that sentence. I was ashamed to be SEEN with you. I like being with you. Oh, you're gonna be in a coma, all right. Guy's a pro. It's called 'taking advantage.' It's what gets you ahead in life. Now, when you do this without getting punched in the chest, you'll have more fun. No, I did not kill Kitty. However, I am going to oblige and answer the nice officer's questions because I am an honest man with no secrets to hide.

Steve Holt! But I bought a yearbook ad from you, doesn't that mean anything anymore? Across from where? Get me a vodka rocks. And a piece of toast. Say goodbye to these, because it's the last time! We just call it a sausage. That's what it said on 'Ask Jeeves.' I've opened a door here that I regret. Well, what do you expect, mother? No! I was ashamed to be SEEN with you. I like being with you. Now, when you do this without getting punched in the chest, you'll have more fun. I'm half machine. I'm a monster. No… but I'd like to be asked!

Michael! As you may or may not know, Lindsay and I have hit a bit of a rough patch. Get me a vodka rocks. And a piece of toast. There's so many poorly chosen words in that sentence. I was ashamed to be SEEN with you. I like being with you. Oh, you're gonna be in a coma, all right. Guy's a pro. It's called 'taking advantage.' It's what gets you ahead in life. Now, when you do this without getting punched in the chest, you'll have more fun. No, I did not kill Kitty. However, I am going to oblige and answer the nice officer's questions because I am an honest man with no secrets to hide.

Steve Holt! But I bought a yearbook ad from you, doesn't that mean anything anymore? Across from where? Get me a vodka rocks. And a piece of toast. Say goodbye to these, because it's the last time! We just call it a sausage. That's what it said on 'Ask Jeeves.' I've opened a door here that I regret. Well, what do you expect, mother? No! I was ashamed to be SEEN with you. I like being with you. Now, when you do this without getting punched in the chest, you'll have more fun. I'm half machine. I'm a monster. No… but I'd like to be asked!

“There's only one man I've ever called a coward, and that's Brian Doyle Murray. No, what I'm calling you is a television actor.”

Michael! As you may or may not know, Lindsay and I have hit a bit of a rough patch. Get me a vodka rocks. And a piece of toast. There's so many poorly chosen words in that sentence. I was ashamed to be SEEN with you. I like being with you. Oh, you're gonna be in a coma, all right. Guy's a pro. It's called 'taking advantage.' It's what gets you ahead in life. Now, when you do this without getting punched in the chest, you'll have more fun. No, I did not kill Kitty. However, I am going to oblige and answer the nice officer's questions because I am an honest man with no secrets to hide.

Steve Holt! But I bought a yearbook ad from you, doesn't that mean anything anymore? Across from where? Get me a vodka rocks. And a piece of toast. Say goodbye to these, because it's the last time! We just call it a sausage. That's what it said on 'Ask Jeeves.' I've opened a door here that I regret. Well, what do you expect, mother? No! I was ashamed to be SEEN with you. I like being with you. Now, when you do this without getting punched in the chest, you'll have more fun. I'm half machine. I'm a monster. No… but I'd like to be asked!

Mike Tribianni

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